Divorce is hard enough and stressful enough on any given day, adding all the extra weight of the Holidays to it can seem completely unbearable. Just thinking about extended family visits, mandatory Holiday parties and all the cooking and shopping we don't have time, energy, or money for, can suck out the last bit of spirit we have left in us.
This time of the year can get extra complicated and emotionally overwhelming if young children are involved in the divorce. If this is their first year of separated households we need to do everything in our power to provide as much emotional support and guidance as humanly possible. And pray hard for the rest.
Divorce is scary. The unknown is so great and unpredictable (even if it's not our first divorce), it can keep us in constant fear. We can only speculate how things will go down, nothing is sure or calculable, there are so many variables at every turn, that we might feel completely overwhelmed or frozen by fear.
To feel overpowering fear sometimes and to have many specifics worries and concerns about our divorce and the future is very normal. We would not be humans if it were otherwise. Fear is a survival instict and during divorce our very survival feels at risk. The purpose of fear is to keep us alive and that's all we want during divorce, to stay alive.
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